Perplexed and Frustrated

I’m struggling to understand my brain.

I cried.

And I don’t know why. I am not sure why I am upset, and I am also not sure why I can’t move past the horrible feelings at the pit of my stomach.

It’s frustrating to not know why I reacted the way I did on Thursday. I wanted S to come, but midway through the night, I wanted S to be gone. I can’t seem to figure out why, which is making it impossible to understand how I feel about S, much less about “us.”

The crappy thing is that this is not very new for me.

This is what happened with SJ last summer. This is what happened with Y in sophomore year. This is what happened with J from Sig Nu. This is what happened with S from the set up party.

I feel like this is a pattern of mine that I do not understand.

I’m terrified this is a larger problem of my seeking out destructive relationships.

Must talk to T about this.

I really wish I was normal sometimes.

xx
e

Advertisements
Previous Post
Leave a comment

Tell me what you think!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

  • Twitter Updates

    Error: Twitter did not respond. Please wait a few minutes and refresh this page.

  • Blog Stats

    • 6,782 hits
  • Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

  • Categories

%d bloggers like this: