Ready to Leave

It has been nearly four years since I arrived in St. Louis, bright-eyed, full of anticipation, naive, and uncertain.

Having grown up in an upper middle class family in a small town in Iowa and later in a good neighborhood of Seoul, I was sheltered by my own privilege. Raised to focus solely on my future, naturally I was self-involved and was atrociously ignorant of the happenings in the peripherals of my life.

College was a huge wake-up call.

To be fair, I did enter yet another bubble of privilege, but some of my classes, my professors, and my peers really pushed me to look beyond what was in front of me and scrutinize what I had accepted as norms. Honestly I don’t know how my life would be now if I hadn’t met my friends E and J. They both pushed me to examine and question societal norms, and they definitely helped me care about things that I hadn’t thought about before.

If anyone were to talk to the high school Eunice, she would have never care so much about sexism and its role in sexual and relationship violence. She wouldn’t have had the vocabulary to discuss racism and micro-oppression. She would not have known about the detrimental social stratification that exist in the US, especially regarding education.

The last four years have been exhausting as they were filled with personal discoveries, heartbreaks, failures (oh so many failures), and oh-my-god-I’ve-been-wrong-all-my-life realizations.

But I think it’s time to move on. It’s time to go.

These past few months, I’ve fallen into a rhythm of things. I know where to be and who to be. I’m comfortable and safe.

I don’t mean to imply that I believe that I have nothing left to learn here. There are so many unlearned lessons nestled in plethora of pockets around this campus, this city.

Yet, I feel that it is time. I am ready to leave my home. I am ready to leave my comfort zone.

I’m ready to thrust myself into the new, unfamiliar; where I must get lost in order to find something I never thought to look for, where I must rediscover my identity, where I must stumble along a hidden path to find the people who will shape my life in more ways than one.

It’s time to say goodbye to St. Louis and search for a new home, because:

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xx

eunice

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1 Comment

  1. V. Lee

     /  July 11, 2013

    BOSTON ❤

    Reply

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